I’ll admit it: I’m a snuggler. I crave physical affection, and have a high tolerance for hugs, hand-holding, and the general infringement of my family’s personal space. Some days I can see the restraining order in my wife’s eyes.

By default, babies are designed for snuggling. They’re small, squishy, and warm. Their smell chemically induces adults to pick them up, hold them close, and sway back and forth. Plus, it’s not as though babies have a choice in the matter. What are they gonna do – jump?

Well, yes. Eventually. When Ian finally gained some measure of control over his flailing limbs, I was worried that our snuggling days were over. It wasn’t that he wouldn’t snuggle; he just had better things to do. A few moments – minutes, if I was lucky – and he’d twist and be gone from my lap. This is why babies bounce, and why God invented wall-to-wall carpeting.

Until recently, Ian was pretty much an involuntary participant in our snuggling. We’d grab him as he ran by and throw him onto the couch. He does like to snuggle, and after a while would burrow into my side.

Not long ago, a few weeks or a month, I noticed that I wasn’t just snuggling – I was being snuggled. During one of our Daddy Nights, Ian stood in the booth at Applebee’s and wrapped an arm around my neck, drawing me closer to him. ‘You want to color with me?’ His breath was warm on my cheek; we colored, and the arm stayed.

This gesture has since become his preferred (and my favorite) method of showing affection. When I kneel to play or talk or demonstrate, Ian’s arm will curl around my neck, fingers gently digging into my skin, until we’re check-to-cheek. ‘You’re my best friend.’ Well, no. I’m your father. But this isn’t the time to argue.

This morning Ian woke up crying; something to do with a booger. I brought him to our bed, Kelly shared her pillow, and Ian turned toward me. He pretended to close his eyes; I could tell, because he was squinting. I was warm and sleepy – is there a better time to snuggle? I took his arm and put it around my neck; his fingers tightened. He smiled and pulled his other arm from under the blankets, the fingers of this hand curled to form ‘I love you‘.^*

Yeah. That’s the stuff.