My Power is Beyond Your Understanding
Three problems:
1) Ian is not allowed to touch Mommy’s soda.
2) Ian is not allowed to touch anything on the table.
3) Ian is very much aware of 1 and 2.
The Vanishing
I’d been looking forward to the time alone, and the chance to take care of some really important things. Movies. Video games. Sleeping late. Having a car. It was a bit like my junior year in high school.
It’s a Plane! I think…
Even if Ian managed to look past my finger, it was still a bit like asking him to find Waldo.
Black-Suited Doctor
‘…the white-suited doctor was replaced by a black-suited doctor, who wrestled, tumbled and noogied the chimp into exhaustion.’
I Needed That
I straightened, and he looked up at me. “What’s up,” I asked. Then he hugged my arm. “Aw, I love you, too,” I said.
I Love This Job
The first time this happened, I was ever so surprised to find myself sucking on Ian’s pacifier as I buckled his seatbelt.
Abnormal Psychology
I’m being given a second chance at early-childhood psychology under the guidance of my son, Professor Watch-Me-Do-This.
Sunday, Sunday, Sunday!
In his quest to walk, Ian has recruited the help of a PLAYSKOOL walker, which looks something like a cross between a lawnmower and a payphone. At first he was skeptical of the walker. His grasp on the handle was tentative, and he took lurching, doubtful steps. He became more and more confident in his […]
Dear All Things Considered:
Woe to me if I were to ever write a Mother’s Day commentary about the faults of mothers.
Big Brother is Watching You
Sometimes he gives himself away by shaking his head before he’s done anything. He’s a terrible Poker player.