As a fruitless female, I can remember taking care of the twins, and in my eyes I was truly a raw recruit! When I took them out in public all I needed to do was put that look of “they are mine” on my face and……no problem. But, you can bet the minute one or both of them went out of control, my look of “they are mine”, instantly became “did I say they were mine? – PLEASE, CAN SOMEBODY HELP ME?”

Had any of those “piteous mall patrons” read just one of your inept American Father Fables, needless to say, they would have been marveled by your ingenious-in-the-sun-shiny-beaded-necklace-baby-experiment!

Or…

For kicks and giggles, if they typed in ‘mother’ and checked their thesaurus, and the same for ‘father’, here’s what they would have discovered……

‘mother’ = look after; care for; protect; nurse; tend.
‘father’ = priest; minister; vicar; member of the clergy.

It’s settled then, fathers are “saints”! I know my father is! Touche’